Beware

Each day wasn’t complete without spending approximately 4 hours in the internet. I didn’t care to apply through agencies because in the first place I didn’t have the money and second ESL teacher hiring is rare in agencies.

I was in the middle of the road riding on a tricycle when my mobile rang. “Hello, Could I possibly speak to Ms. Estrellita Mayonila?” the voice with a British accent asked. “Yes this is Estrellita.” I answered kinda shouting to overpower the noises from the tricycle and the other vehicles around. “Wow! Are you outside? The noise’s a bit hurting my ears.” She said she will call me back after 5 minutes. The driver got mad at me because I told him to stop right away while we were still in the middle of the road. Before he realized I was already out from his tricycle and ran myself to the nearby pavement. (Thanks that I paid him ahead.) Five minutes after the lady called back. In a hurried voice she asked me how soon I can get a visa for Japan because they wanted to hire me as a teacher. She added that she will call back again after 2 days. I was bowled over; it was mind-boggling that I was hired without any interview or exams. Of course, I didn’t believe what she said.

I told Rodnie and my brother in Japan about the call both of them have the same answered it was fraud. Two days had passed the lady didn’t call back. However, I received another call but it wasn’t from Japan but from China saying they’re also interested to hire me but at least this time there was a kind of interview. She advised me to apply for a tourist visa first to make everything fast and easy and we’ll process the working visa later. She sounded convincing to me yet I told her that I might need their school profile during my visa application. She said she will email me but she never did.
Those guys were rather unlucky to choose me as a prey.

The force was with me

My dream that I was flying happened at least 3 times a week and I was already so exasperated. I wanted to disregard everything: the mental, physical and emotional weariness that I incurred and of course I wanted to forget my dream, my desire to work abroad.

For a week of not asking anything from God, this time I yielded. “God could you pls. give me peace of mind?” I humbly asked. Well, God didn’t answer me because there was I again up above flying in my dreams. Then I finally realize that no one can ever solve my predicament except me. So I recalled again the 2 likely reasons why I had this dream: first because of my strong yearning to really work abroad and second this is another sign that God is giving me. I can’t deny myself that the first reason was utterly right and what if the second reason is also right? Suddenly my Aquarian personality hit me and these words were seemingly glowing what was once a dark road “Every Cloud has a Silver Lining” I went back to the church and there I walked again with my knees from the entrance to the altar, teary-eyed I said my prayers again and again.

Guided by optimism and faith I started sending resumes and applications in the internet for ESL teacher to all non-english speaking countries. (maximum of 12 applications a day) I did this for a year. 50% did not reply and 50% acknowledged my applications with 2 common reasons: they don’t have vacancy or they need a native-english speaking teacher.

But this time,there was no room for giving up. I felt like I was a Jedi in Starwars ( lol) “the force was with me”

What Dreams May Come

Part 7

I went on with my tutorial classes for over a year but wasn’t in high spirits because I failed to provide full financial support to my nieces with their education.

Then came an offer from a friend to work in the US, it wasn’t a teaching job but I was dancing in glee as it was related to my previous work (sales) and I thought that God had finally answered me . However in one snap of a finger it was gone ( I was denied by the embassy). I was staring blankly as tears rolled down from my eyes. “If this is a game, I’m not playing this anymore.” I said to myself.
I wanted to ask God again but it seemed everything was futile. So I decided to keep quiet; no complains and no questions.

My life went on as I tried to forget my dream to work abroad. And though I chose myself to stay quiet, I still gave Him thanks for giving me another life each day yet I didn’t heed to pray for signs and for directions.

I was in the middle of enjoying myself flying as I watched the sunrise clasped the earth while the breeze kissed the leaves when I heard the phone rang. I woke up stunned that I was just on my bed lying not flying. The phone rang again, it was my brother asking me “why won’t you try applying as ESL tutor abroad?” I was still kinda groggy from my flying dream so I just said “ok” right away.
Applying for a tutorial abroad did not make sense to me so I didn’t care to apply.
My “technical dream that I was flying” went on and it almost happened every night although I didn’t think about it prior to sleep. I shared it with Rodnie and we came up with 2 likely reasons: perhaps because of my strong yearning to work abroad and perhaps it’s an indication that I do really have a chance to work abroad. I told Rodnie not to talk about signs as it will just give me headaches.

So I just smiled and said “What dreams may come”

My Prayers ( part 6)

I quit my job and went on with my medication. Still, I didn’t receive any answer from God why he gave me an infirmity that is hindering my dream. Why he seized away the work that I already started to love. There were lots of unrequited questions and I was already dead beat to look and wait for an answer.

But life has to go on. I didn’t allow myself to be put in a cage of confusion all the way. Luckily, I found a lighter side of my job; an ESL tutorial. Albeit, I earned less than my full time teaching job at least it wasn't that stressful for me. And the next thing I knew, I was already earning parallel to my full time salary before. I taught as an ESL after-school teacher in CIS while I also had my home tutorial. True, I doubled or tripled my efforts but this time I was amazed that I was doing fine physically. (perhaps because it was a one-on-one class). Then suddenly, I realized that I haven’t been praying or praising to Him lately and I felt guilty.

So I prayed to him “ God thank you for these blessings. I don’t know if this is already your answer of my questions to give up my dream to work abroad (because I believed that tutorial experience is not a strong qualification for teaching abroad) but God you know very well, that my wish to work abroad is not just for myself but also for my family especially to my nieces who need financial support for their education. But with conviction, you know what is best for me so I humbly ask you to please steer me to the right direction of your will. Amen.”

(This became my prayer when I went to Sto. Nino church every Friday and walked with my knees from its entrance towards the altar.)

The Sign started to get vague (part 5)

I started my first teaching job full of energy and excitement. Since the job wasn’t a piece of cake as many would have probably thought, I wielded multiple efforts ( I taught 3 subjects in a day with over 40 students in a class). I studied my lessons, prepared plans and teaching materials;burning midnight oil became my routine. (the job was 360 degrees turn from my previous where I didn’t have to take home my work) yet teaching is also an exciting job, everyday is a challenge. However, came the time when I felt worn out already physically and mentally. My migraine attack occurred 3 times in a week and ‘twas severe, it lasted for 3 hours or so and I was also diagnosed with GERD (an acid reflux disease). I was advised by our principal to take a leave of absence for a week and my co-teachers told me not to bent out of shape “ You’ll be fine.” Their words of encouragement triggered me to continue the challenge. I still experienced migraine attacks as well as acid reflux but thanks to the medicines the pains were not much as before.
Dilemma happened at the end of the school year when we were asked to sign the contract for the next school year. My love for teaching has already progressed and yet my physical condition wasn’t still better. I was all ears to various advices my family and friends gave me. The big question was “could I still muddle through the pressures of the job?” I wanted to give it another try not only for the reason that 1 year experience isn’t enough but because I still love to be a part of the school. However, I was also scared that my illness will get worst. Consequently, I quit the job and asking God "why is this happening?" I felt down in the dumps.

The Signs (Part 4 Wish to work abroad)

After the licensure exam, I entrusted everything to God. I said to Him let my result in the board exam be the sign whether you want me to pursue this dream or not. I was still jobless. I didn’t apply any job because I was still in a state of perplexity.
I was in our hometown, when Rodnie called me over the phone with his voice full of excitement “You passed the board!!!” I was speechless for couple of minutes, my eyes were shut then with the strength of my larynx I shouted “ Yooohoooo…thank You!.”

Apparently, this wasn’t the finish line. I needed to have teaching experiences to go on with this dream. I knew it will take me another long phase of reaching my star but this time I was so motivated by the “sign” that God had given me.

Time was too precious to waste. My applications were sent straight away to different schools. First call, I got accepted but the compensation wasn’t quite enough to support my needs & my bills. ( I was already ashamed of my brother for supporting me over a year) “God, I don’t need just a job experience but finances as well.” I prayed. Second call from another school, I had an IQ exam ( wasn’t able to finish) but I got a chance to demo. It was my first time to handle a class because I didn’t have a practicum. The aftermaths were nausea and vomiting.

Then God gave me another sign, I was hired!. ( with remarkable compensation)
Plus wonderful co-teachers and friends.

( madam rich, can't find our photo huhuhu.send me 1 pls. f u have ;)

My Angel w/ her daughter and My Darling

The test ( part 3 wish to work abroad)

Part 3 –The Test

I was baffled yet I didn’t give up the LET considering the money and effort I’ve already spent. Came the examination day, I didn’t feel jumpy nor confident. I was just there bluntly to take the test as my iceberg of yearning for this career started to melt down.

We were almost ready to start the whole-day exam(Secondary) when our proctor put us to halt. She was counting the forms and said that someone made an error in filling up the form, instead of Set A she/he filled up Set B ( our group was divided into 2 sets) . The proctor ran through the paper to find out who, while we were busy murmuring. “ Ms. Mayonila” someone called me but I didn’t bother I was busy chatting with my seatmate and perhaps it’s another “Mayonila” ( though I had a hunch that it was me) “ Ms. Estrellita Mayonila” the voice said it clearly this time. “Yes” I said, and then I felt the warm blood rushing through my veins. It was the proctor who called me and yes I was the one who mistakenly filled up the “Sets”. I wasn’t blushing because we were late to start the exam due to my carelessness but when the proctor said “ Lucky for you, I found your error, your score in the test could have been zero.” I was thunderstruck. She explained to us that the machine is programmed to check the paper by “Sets”. Anyway, she wasn’t mad at me but even if she was I won’t mind because she was an angel.

We started the exam. Some were thinking hard, some were answering fast, some were edgy and I was just enjoying eating my nuts and chocolates while answering the test. I was thankful though at least I was 85% sure of my answers for the “principles & methods of educ” ( is this the term hehe sorry it’s been years)my DPE helped a lot, but for the “Gen. Ed” hmmm , I did a “minnie-miny-mooh” ( it only covers 20% of the total score anyway, that was my philosophy). In the afternoon we did the second part, my major subject was English. ( covers 40% of the total score) My eyes rolled up as it opened wide, “ tis gonna be the end.” I said to myself. Almost all of the questions were about literature asking you authors, titles and blah,blah . I had no choice but to make guesses again, needless to say that I was in a hurry to get done as I was already worn-out and sleepy.

“ How’s the exam?” my boyfriend asked. “Oh, well it needs prayer if I want to pass.” I answered.